Check it out.

http://elder.teddjohnson.org

Speaking to my Branch President last night, I discovered that my mission call is in the mail! As soon as I have it I will be recording my opening and showing it here (http://elder.teddjohnson.org) so check it out!

Concerts my shoes have been to:
Blink-182 (With All-American Rejects and Fallout Boy)
Motion City Soundtrack
Eve 6

I love when poetry just sort of flows from my brain. I honestly take no credit for things like this (though criticism I readily accept), because frankly I don’t think it was me who wrote it. It was inspired as I was crawling into bed a few weeks ago, and now I’ve decided to share it. Just a few days ago I read the parable of the Talents, and how those who bury their talents are cast out for they squander them. I implore any who have a gift, be it poetry, music, art, chemistry, hurdles, or frankly anything else, to share it often. Do it because you love it, and the Talent will flow on it’s own.

Satan tried to make me feel bad today,

Earlier this week, a dear friend of mine introduced me to a new DJ. I would love to share the link, but due to being specifically asked NOT to spread it around, I will honor that. (Yes, I think it’s a tad silly because I love to share music, media, and anything interesting, but alas that’s another subject).

This particular “album” is an hour long mix, with a lot of hip-hop, rap, alternative rock, and even some Eighties music too! I have to say: Love. Pure and simple. The way the music is mixed, it seriously appeals to my ADD, and keeps me very entertained. In fact, I enjoyed it so much, I’m hoping to find more music like that (hour-long mixes that keep my ADD happy).

What I especially love about something like this, is that it really helps my focus. I have very prominent ADD. I don’t see this as a disability at all, in fact it’s something that I am rather pleased with myself about. My ADD lets me be the best responder in any kind of “critical” or emergency situation, it gives me a ton of empathy, and allows me to pay attention to minute details. It also makes me really bored at work, which is bad for focus. So with music filling up one of my “thought channels” (especially something like this, that is unpredictable and mixes up so I don’t have to keep finding new things myself), the other channels can get to work. And interestingly enough, this also gets my creative juices flowing!

It’s hard to be bored when you’re able to actively use all of your thought channels at once. So I absolutely recommend listening to music that helps your focus. Tons of psychology studies back this up (if this blog had readers, I’d do something cool like post a different article for each word in that sentence to back me up).

Long story short: ADD isn’t a disability, and This music makes me dance.

The following poem I wrote just after midnight December first. It’s paired with another poem I wrote that’s currently referred to as “November Poem”, which I haven’t completed enough to post yet. I’ll link the two when I do.

My opinion of this poem is that it’s kinda sappy and personal. It’s the sort of thing I would write for a girl, and maybe never show them. My inspiration was that after recognizing the end of November, and frankly the pain I felt for the majority of it, I wanted to be positive again. We control our perception, even if we have no control over other people’s actions, we choose how we want to see things. In this poem, I’m clearly expressing my choice to find the hope, because even if it’s unfounded, hope must exist for anything else positive to be built upon.

I’d also like to note that I usually dislike writing rhyming poems, but this one basically flowed out as I was getting ready for bed, full rhymes and all. I don’t think it follows any particular scheme, other than ABAC or BACA.

I actually wish I had posted this back then, because while I still enjoy the poem, and parts of the sentiment are still true, it feels like the “spirit” of inspiration for it has defiantly evolved into something else. Either way, here is the first posted poem of “The Months”.

December Hopeful

You think I hate you,
That’s just not true.
You think it’s over?
Well that’s wrong too.

My dearest love
From days gone past,
I’ve prayed now daily
For us to last.

Eternity is a long time…
But you won’t be lonely,
I’ll be here forever,
For your love only.

Pray about this always,
For one day you’ll see:
The most perfect love ever
Is between you and me.

And in the meantime,
I’ll try not to cry,
While I see you wander
On the arm of that guy.

My hope will survive winter,
My love survive pain,
Because one day darling
We’ll be together a’gain.

Trickle trickle,
sweat sweat.
You see me
as such a scary threat.

I know too much,
I see to deep.
Every thought you have
it seems to seep,

Out of your mind
your feelings leak
and into mine
I see them weep.

Your fear is unfounded,
your mistrust stabs my heart,
every time you lie to me,
it’s tearing us apart.

Asunder,
asound,
please turn this around.

Trickle trickle,
Sweat sweat.
please don’t
give up on me just yet.

Well, it’s Halloween again, which means another excuse to watch my favorite movie of all time Donnie Darko. I think the best way to describe this movie is “weird”. After spending numerous hours researching the meaning, going through the website, and especially watching the director’s cut, I can say with some authority that I get this movie. It makes sense! Below I decided to post a random quite from the movie that I found amusing. Donnie is the green lines, and his close-minded crazy “health studies” teacher is the blue ones.

I’m sorry, I just don’t get this.

Just place an X in the appropriate place on the lifeline.

I just don’t get this. Everything can’t be lumped into to categories. that’s too simple.

The lifeline is divided that way.

Well, life isn’t that simple. So what if Ling Ling kept the cash and returned the wallet? That has nothing to do with either fear or love.

Fear and love are the deepest of human emotions.

Well, yeah… OK, but you’re not listening to me. there are other things that need to be taken into account here. Like the whole spectrum of human emotion. You’re just lumping everything into these two categories… and, like, denying everything else. People aren’t that simple.

I got an email saying I had a new comment the other day. I get them from time to time. But almost all of them are spam. Which is fine.

Except Trai’s comment, errr Elder Henson, which I appreciated.

I realized that I don’t post that often. which is also fine. I really don’t care. I don’t think anyone has this in their RSS reader, and aside from the very occasional time someone sees my email address and thinks “gee, I wonder if that’s a real site” I doubt anyone wonders on by.

I may post more often. It’s been recommended that writing may be therapeutic for me. But recently my desire and ability to write have failed.

so maybe I will start critically analyzing things, for my own amusement. There’s not going to be a whole lot of emotion in these posts, but the utter lack of caring could be construed as “funny” to some.

Hey Ya’ll,

it’s SysAdmin appreciation day. you’d better appreciate your SysAdmins…otherwise, they’ll shut down your systems, turn your email box into a spam-trap, and tell the FBI that you’re investigating “patriotically questionable websites”

in the interested of being appreciated, I will be leaving early. Actually, it’s because of an Angel’s game. Go Angels!